Rules of Argentinian Street “Futbol”

Pelota I don’t know what you do when you are waiting for a plane. I usually work, read, but also check internet sites and social networks. Some days ago, I was in the lounge, waiting for a plane, and someone posted the rules of argentinian street football (that thing the “americans” call soccer and the argentinians call “futbol”). It was funny to remember how I used to play that way, so I took the liberty to translate those rules into english so people can learn more about the argentinian culture through one of our favorite sports.

  • The Fat guy is always the goalkeeper
  • If there’s no Fat guy, goalkeeper changes with every goal, but the most “boludo” ends up being the goalkeeper
  • If there’s a penalty, the goalkeeper changes from the Fat guy to a good goalkeeper
  • The match finishes only when everybody is tired
  • It doesn’t matter if a team is winning by 20 to 0, the one that scores the last goal wins
  • There’s no referee
  • If there’s no blood, there’s no foul
  • Nobody simulates a foul, the one that does that is a “puto”
  • There’s no off-side
  • The two best players cannot play for the same team
  • Whoever shoots the ball out of the field needs to go and get it back
  • If there’s no agreement if a goal is valid, it’s decided with a penalty
  • There’s no crossbar in the goal, the height of the goal is determined by the height of the goalkeeper
  • There’s always one that’s called to have lunch (or dinner) by his mother
  • You need to pay attention to the cars that might come by the street
  • The prize for the winner is a Coke; nobody pays it
  • If there’s no ball, you can make one out of socks
  • There’s always one that complains because all his teammates go to the attack but never come back to defend
  • There are constant debates because the own goal is bigger than the rival’s one
  • The goal’s posts are made by hoodies
  • There’s the goalkeeper that likes to dribbles and ends up losing the ball
  • The “morfon” that never passes the ball, never gets the ball from his teammates
  • If the owner of the ball gets angry (i.e., because nobody passes him the ball), he leaves with the ball and the game ends
  • Goal from behind the mid-field line isn’t valid
  • If someone holds the ball for too long and someone hits him, it’s his fault for holding the ball too long
  • The ball is still in play even if it bounces against a tree, monument, the wall or whatever other thing around
  • The game isn’t suspended by rain
  • If the one that plays better arrives late to the match (and the teams are even at that time), the more “boludo” gets replaced by the best player
  • If the one that plays worst arrives late, he doesn’t get to play because the teams are already complete
  • You celebrate the goals as if you are winning the World Cup final

These rules apply to playing football in a park, as well. Basically, anytime we play in any place that’s not an actual football field 😛

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About ignaciosb

An expat who lives in airports and works in many things at an information security company
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